


When I fell in love with you...

by Zwiezraczek



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Asexual Kinkade, Canon Universe, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, I wanted them to be fluffy all the way, M/M, aaaah this pairing will kill me one day, and Kinkade being an adorable human being, and Lance loving him so much, pining Kinkade, sharpshooters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 15:27:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15776874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zwiezraczek/pseuds/Zwiezraczek
Summary: Ryan wasn't the type of guy to fall in love, he fell in love once and it broke his heart so he never wanted to love, to trust, to care. But this time, everything struck him as fast as it could, maybe not like the first time by developing a crush, by trying to figure out what was happening to him at the moment because now he knew: Ryan fell for him like he never did.





	When I fell in love with you...

**Author's Note:**

> I'm joining the Lyan/Kinklance train with this little drabble. It's like nothing, it's fluff only and... I need these Sharpshooter boyfriends to be happy together okay?  
> They are definitely my new otp. Definitely.

Ryan wasn't the type of guy to fall in love, he fell in love once and it broke his heart so he never wanted to love, to trust, to care. But this time, everything struck him as fast as it could, maybe not like the first time by developing a crush, by trying to figure out what was happening to him at the moment because now he knew: Ryan fell for him like he never did. He talked about it to James, he told him how much he was impressed when he saw him in his blue suit speaking loudly with the members of his family, this smile, this gorgeous smile haunting him every night since they all arrived on Earth. He had something special in the way he moved, something smooth that made his eyes follow every curve of his body in the Garrison's uniform; he spoke to everybody with a great joy, joking around when everybody needed that, being the one having an eye on anybody, being the trusted one. Ryan would trust him with anything.

He was Keith's right hand, he guided him and Pidge through places that the Garrisson couldn't imagine with cold-blood, his eye fixed on them through his laser gun. And looking at him like this, in the moonlight made Ryan feel fragile and kind of weak, not the weakness he could experience when he first fell in love relying on his partner who let him down and the fall hurt, no. He felt the need to be held again against somebody, to feel the warmth of somebody's chest, to finally feel protected.

“That thing pick up heat signatures”, he finally dared to ask while trying to focus on the mission they were on, looking away from Lance.

“It actually locks on to their suits”, Lance answered seriously still watching his friend's back, “sonar imaging and renders a 3D map within a twenty-foot perimeter. It's cool paladin stuff”, he concluded.

“Got movment to the north”, Ryan acknowledged Allura calmly. “Drones closing on your positions from the adjacent alley”, he never remembered being so troubled about a mission, having issues with focusing on what he was currently doing. And when Allura told him that they were spotted he didn't hesitate to shoot causing the coming of a large troop of Galras.

Shit, he taught. He couldn't embarrass himself more than he already did in front of him, failing this in front of Lance meant so much, he had to repair his mistake, now; and as Veronica told him the positions of their enemies he told which ones he would shoot first.

“I got the other two”, Lance sounded concentrated meaning that he left Keith and Pidge's back to help him.

At this moment, he didn't know anything and as enemies multiplied in front of them Lance joined his side to shoot them with him telling Keith to come back to the base.

 

* * *

 

When they came back at the base Ryan took off his helmet, trying to gather all the emotions that made his heart shaking, being so close to Lance during the way back: it was more than a crush, it was an instant crush. When he put his helmet on the shelf, he felt a presence next to him, he saw the blue helmet being taken off and revealing the beautiful face of the Blue Paladin, or Red, Ryan couldn't figure this out yet. Seeing him close, so close to him made his heart race a bit but his stoic face didn't betray the beating that his heart never missed.

“Good job Kinkade”, Lance finally said surprising Ryan, “that was really awesome! Like, I'm good and stuff but your skills are great”, the paladin pursued with enthusiasm.

“Th-thank you; Sir”, Ryan answered feeling heat on his cheeks as he replied with a little smile after a large moment of surprise. Dis he really said Sir to him? This was so embarrassing.

“ No need to call me sir you know, name's just Lance”, he said holding out his hand to Ryan. “And I suppose your name isn't Kinkade, right?”

“I'm Ryan”, he answered taking his hand and feeling how soft it was, how warm and how lucky he felt about holding his hand in his.

“So Ryan, we'll talk later about technology and stuff if you want, I mean if you want no pressure about it”, Lance proposed that to him and Ryan could only nod, in fact he nodded as casually as always but with butterflies in his stomach. “Great so... We see each other after the meeting, like... Here?”

“Yeah, sure”, that answer was lame but for a person as stressed as him answering this was a huge step forward.

“Cool, so see ya then!”

Ryan could only wave at him, with a stupid little smile on his face; as soon as Lance left he felt a hand on his shoulder, James obviously with this little smirk he used to have when Ryan told him something that could lighten his day, to be the friend that adores annoying his friends about little details.

“Oh, Kinkade is that a date”, he asked while looking right in his eyes.

“Shut up Griffin.”

“I take that as a yes.”

 

* * *

 

When he saw Voltron falling, the lions falling apart in different places on Earth he felt his heart aching; but as soon as he knew that the paladins were alright he was relieved. And as soon as he knew that he could go and see Lance to talk to him his heart started to race as a crazy machine. It was ages since he felt like this, and all of that made James laugh because “the great Kinkade never falls in love” bullshit. Lance was more than that, and they shared moments together speaking of laserguns, of technology, sharing the same passion of music, loving Beyonce together, speaking about their families for hours... Lance was more than a crush, he was like a soulmate he waited for. And Ryan knew he wouldn't be his hero, but at least he wanted to try to make him as happy as possible.

One day, when he was sure that nobody would be there, nor his friends, nor his family he decided to come with a little bow of chocolates because he sucked at picking little presents. Lance was facing the window, his skin bathed in rays of sun and his hair -not greasy at all- on his forehead. He looked stunning despite being still a bit off.

“Hey Lance”, he whispered entering the room a little bit anxious as the Cuban man looked at him with joyful eyes.

“Oh Ryan, I'm happy to see you”, he said with a genuine smile. “It's been... A month, I think? I missed you a lot, and talking to you too”, he continued as he sat properly on his bed with the cushions behind his head. “Come on, sit here on the edge of the bed; everybody does that it's fine.”

His soft voice was something that Ryan missed the most, a voice that reassured him, always. He showed him the little box he had in his hand and put it on the little table next to his bed as Lance thanked him saying that these were his favorites -something that Ryan knew for a little moment now-. He planned this moment a billion times in his head, even practiced it with James and getting to the point that he felt totally comfortable with the situation. Well, everything he knew, he practiced with James, words he selected to tell him: everything was gone in a large blush on his face while he tried to avoid his ocean blue eyes and drown again in them.

“Ry, are you okay”, Lance asked with a soft voice putting his hand on Ryans's shoulder; calling him Ry became a Lance's thing, something he did when he felt that Ryan had something to get off his chest.

“To be honest, I've never felt better in my life and at the same time the worst”, he admitted avoiding his look. “I had a whole speech about that, I practiced it with James and... Shit I can't; I need to tell you this this way”, he finally said looking at him while Lance made a curious expression. “When I saw you, like when you came back on Earth and all I... I had a big crush on you since I saw you on tv three years ago, I don't know maybe that smile had something to do with that. And when you came back, I was sure I turned the page of the stupid crush but... Hell no. I felt strange. It felt so strange to see your happy face, just right there in front of my eyes. And when you came to see me after our first mission together telling me that I did a good job even if I did terrible mistakes I... I just lost control, and I wanted to be with you forever even as a friend...”

“Ry...”

“And when I taught that you died, that everything was gone that I had no chance to see you ever again I... This was the first time in forever I felt my heart stop beating as if nothing mattered around because you were not there. So here I am, rambling about my feelings and finally telling you that I love you more than I could ever imagine. I'm sorry”, he whispered looking at his own hands when Lance's hand reached his and he dared look his pretty eyes again, he would never forget this moment.

“What are you waiting for then”, he asked with a little smile. “If you're sorry you should be because you gave me no clue about the fact that it could work, you... Ah, I can't even properly say something bad about you!"

Ryan felt... Lost. Everything came too fast to him, his expression must have been priceless because it made Lance softly laugh; but as soon as he finished laughing a soft smile appeared on his face who slowly approached his until they mouths reunited. He kissed him. Without any hesitation. Without any fear. Only butterflies in his stomach, only his legs feeling weak, only Lance. And when finally stopped kissing him, he leaned his forehead against Ryan's before whispering.

“Now I forgive you, Ry. I forgive you, because I love you as much as you love me.”

 

* * *

 

“Can we go to your room?”

Ryan nearly gasped everything from his parted lips as Lance couldn't stop kissing him again and again, against the wall of Garrison's corridor. Ryan loved kisses, he loved Lance's kisses because they felt like like everything sweet that you could only imagine. He loved these eyes he could see, so close to his, eyes in which galaxies were hidden.

Without any hesitation, Lance grabbed his hand as he kissed his cheek and leaded the way to his room. Since the came back with the team, he had his own room there, or maybe a room that he shared with Ryan -more likely-. When he opened the door, and slowly pushed Ryan inside he couldn't help himself but after shutting the door he had to kiss him again and again, having his hands on his face as he bit delicately his lips. Ryan was stepping back as Lance pushed him while kissing, he sat on his lap, maybe for the first time, and began to run his hands all over his muscular body, coming down, having just in mind unzipping Ryan's pants, right now.

And then, Ryan knew he had to stop him. It was an urge, he really didn't want to hurt his feelings but he had to.

“Lance”, he gasped as he tried to push him backwards, “I'm sorry I... I don't want it. I... I'm sorry. I should have told you...”

This was why he avoided falling in love. Because for everybody love meant sex, but for Ryan love was more than that; it was being happy with the person, enjoying moments, even the smallest, together as a couple. Then, like a flash, he remembered the disgusted face of his first boyfriend, the one who dumped him because of that; when Ryan tried to stop him, he pushed him away he called him a “slut”, a “fucking tease”. He understood that probably nobody would understand how much he wanted to just be loved, not to make love to anyone right now, not to desire somebody's body, to maybe worship it as the body of his loved one, but nothing more. He feared the deception in Lance's eyes, he feared being judged, rejected.

“I'm sorry Ryan”, he softly answered as he put his hands away, “I did something wrong?”

“No... It's just... I'm asexual Lance. I'm sorry.”

It came out. He came out. He feared every world, every syllable that he pronounced. And mostly? He knew that he could be rejected for what he said; he never told his first boyfriend back then because it was too scary and that leaded to the same situation, he slammed the door insulting him. He wasn't able to look at Lance, he had not enough strength.

“Oh.”

He knew. It smelled rejection, it looked like every hope he built on this relationship was gone, in ruins now. If Lance had to tell him to fuck off, he wanted it to be quick. He wanted to cry in his room, alone.

“Don't be sorry about it Ry. So... You want to watch a movie and cuddle instead”, Lance asked him as he sat next to him with a little awkward smile.

“You... You won't tell me tu fuck off, you won't tell me I'm a tease or a slut”, his voice was cracked, the pain of what he lived a few years ago showing again.

“Why? I mean, it's okay but you should have told me that earlier so I would not... Yeah, I made things awkward, I'm sorry. I should have asked you first but I taught, and you know when I'm thinking it isn't always the best and you see it's...”

“You are sorry”, Ryan cut his in the middle of his sentence, doubting what he heard.

“Yes, I am. I don't want things to be awkward between us, I want you to feel comfortable around me, okay love?”

And that was when Ryan realised. Lance wasn't his soulmate, he was his angel. He nodded slowly, agreeing for cuddling and watching a movie; Lance kissed his cheek delicately.

“I love you Ryan.”

“I love you too Lance.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked it, leave a comment, a kudo and if you want you can find me on [Tumblr](https://zwiezraczek.tumblr.com/)


End file.
